Mic Check 1,2 ….

Well, it’s been 7 weeks since I took a break to focus on my mental and physical health. There have been a lot of hard days, some good days and some I don’t really remember. I have always been described as “strong”, “tough”, someone who does whatever it takes no matter what and fiercely independent. While these traits are often synonymous with driven women, somewhere along the way I lost sight of what was best for me - Tracy. To be honest, I don’t know if I’ve ever really known what’s best for me (that’s a while other kettle of fish). I have a lot of people helping me navigate through this chapter, most with accomplished medical backgrounds, some who’s gif games are strong, but hey it takes a village.. hahaha

I wish I had the courage to be honest with myself about what I needed a while ago, to care less about being seen as failing and understand that choosing yourself is never a weakness. If there’s anything you dear reader (see what I did there) take from my journey, courage and real strength is showing up for yourself - especially when it’s uncomfortable.

Speaking of uncomfortable and completely mind blowing - an update on my bariatric journey. I’m officially down 133 pounds, I can’t even comprehend it. It’s been a lot of work, a lot of sacrifice, but no regrets. I’ve been working with a new trainer at the gym, check out her IG @anaandthemachines. She’s a powerhouse Brazilian body builder who’s been an unexpected ray of sunshine. Ana believes in me more than I believe in myself most days. She had me dead lift what I’ve lost (close, 135 pounds). It was HARD and humbling, I carried that weight on me every single minute of every day. Having the surgery was the single best thing I have ever done for myself, I’m certain it saved my life.